I have that empty feeling. Maybe it’s just me that has this when famous people die. I don’t feel loss as such because I didn’t really know Kobe Bryant or his daughter Gianna. I just knew they were there. Somewhere. And now they’re not. I don’t know Vanessa Bryant so I genuinely can’t imagine what she is going through. I gave birth to my third daughter last year, a few weeks before she gave birth to her fourth. Having a little baby to look after knowing she won’t remember her father must be so heartbreaking. But again that’s a guess. I don’t actually know. When I think about what it would be like to have my family devastated like that I feel sick. So I just don’t think about it too much. Like all the terrible things I read about in the news; if I actually thought about it, I mean really think about it I would be a constant ball of stress and grief.
It’s part of the reason why I created this blog. It’s supposed to be a way to focus on what makes me happy rather than worrying too much about things I can’t do much about on my own. Like about the planet warming up and plastic waste and Brexit and re-education camps and bush fires. I could go on but you get the point. Don’t get me wrong. If there is something I can do about it like VOTE or recycle then I’m there but I’ve decided enough is enough with the worrying.
But occasionally something happens that is so relatable yet so far removed from reality it makes me stop. What can I do? Thoughts and prayers? Yes I’ve done that. Donate to the MambaOnThree fund to support the other families who tragically lost members too? That’s probably the most practical support. Send a card? It all feels like it isn’t enough. This is all just very sad and there isn’t a lot to be done except wait for time to pass and the feeling to go away.
And then there’s the fact that it’s Kobe. KOBE! He is one of those athletes, like Michael Owen the footballer, that I grew up with. I remember being a kid at school and seeing them jogging onto the court or pitch for the first time. Not much older than me. Barely left school. Socks pulled over their knees and shorts a little too big. I remember thinking they were so cool to be so good at what they do and still be a kid like me. Time has flown. Michael Owen is retired and breeds horses. Kobe is gone already. I’m a middle class, middle aged mum of 3. Look at us! How did we reach this point so quickly?
I’m not saying Kobe was a saint. But this is not the time to go over all the problematic and downright wrong things he did. I’m just taking a moment to really think about what happened to the lives of those on that helicopter and the lives of the families involved before I carry on with mine.
